AMerrick

http://www.weight-loss-forums.buddyslim.com/weight-loss-challenge/6755-h20-12-pounds-christmas-challenge-week-1-a.html

I often hear people giving me compliments for the kind of person I am. I am often told that I am kind, sweet, nice, and that I inspire people. Then sometimes I get nothing but insults, saying that Im rude, selfish, and that I am hated. Sometimes I’m fighting a battle I can’t win. For once in my life, I think it is time that I become selfish. For as long as I can remember I have put other peoples wants and needs before my own. I am the kind of person who will do anything you ask of me, within reason.

For the past couple weeks I have been slacking with my weight loss. I have been letting my stress get the best of me and not been caring about what happens. I have been lazy, and moping around like the world is coming to an end when I know its not. I am in this rut that Im having a rough time getting out of. Ive been giving advise to everyone, and I am finally going to take my own advise for once. I am going to start a disciplinary system for myself. If I eat more than a smidge of junk food, I am going to make myself do something extra. Each bite of that fatty, calorie infested, sugar coated, sodium loaded food I am going to make myself do ATLEAST 25 sit ups, push ups, sprints, lunges.. Something. Im not allowing myself to poison myself with this junk without being punished, I have worked soo hard to get to where I am and here I am destroying myself yet again,. I am worth this and sometimes I dont feel that I am. Sometimes I have no self worth.

Along with the disciplinary system, I am going to start a self esteem program with myself. I am going to set aside atleast 5 minutes during the week to look at myself in the mirror. Look for the newest changes in my body, and I am going to state that change to myself and say the positive out comes of the newest change, If I dont see much of a change I am going to tell myself how good I have been doing and I am going to push myself harder, so I can see that new change the following week. I am not going to have self esteem issues anymore. I am going to learn to love myself. When I find flaws that I dont like, Im going to find a way to deal with them,. Because I should love myself.. I cant feel so low about me anymore..

I need to start looking into a food drive/food bank for the end of my challenge. Im donating as many items to the food bank as pounds as I lose.. I cant wait to see how many items of food that we donate to the needy.. Along with that, as I start shrinking out of my clothes, I am going to donate them to the needy as well, If I dont get into the program with my H20 ladies to exchange. I may do that too. Along with changing me I want to help those who are less fortunate.

Along with all thats been said above.. I am going to set aside ATLEAST 30 minutes for ME to workout or meditate daily. That will be aside from keeping up with the house work, which I am going to be better about. Along with that I am going to set aside one night a week that I can pamper myself. Bubble bath, pedicure (that I will do on my own), keep up with my body maintenance.. I got to get better about that.. For soo long I havent cared and let myself go.. Its time that I take pride in myself.

With all thats been said, Im going to attempt to do a daily blog on here about my progress on all of the above.. I am going to use my “tools” and “resources” on here more religiously than I have been. Its time to make myself accountable for everything I eat, do, feel, ect.. Im responsible for me being how I am.. and its time to take the responsibility to get myself back into the healthy shape I should be in..

Until next time.. This is AprilVal and Im signing off..

When I was last on this site.. There was alot of bull crap, drama going on. So I chose to leave it. I dont know if its cleared up but I might give it a try again.. to incorporate it with my myfitnesspal since I haven’t been on here I have started a group called H20 we do challenges every so often and they have gone quite well.. Debating on starting it over here.. the Current Challenge is 12 Pounds of Christmas.. anyone interested

I’m one pound away form my mini goal.. Yay!! My official Weigh in isnt until tomorrow.. But I wanted to see how much I lost this week so far.. Its been a good week.. Ive burned over 1000 calories two days this week.. most the week, Ive burned most of what Ive ate. The only calories that havent been cancelled out have been my dinner calories.

“If one cannot command attention by one’s admirable qualities one can at least be a nuisance. ” -Margery Allingham

I will not sit here and allow someone to ruin this website. I was told of a woman who has created numerous accounts to “bug” people. I’m sorry but if you have nothing better to do but sit here and make remarks that are uncalled for, maybe you should find a new hobby. This website is here to help people, not to discourage them. If we can’t get her banned from BuddySlim.. We atleast can make sure the problem is known.. Maybe take action of our.

Maybe for once instead of being a nuisance, you can act mature and move on. Im not about to let YOU get the best of me. I will not deal with people like you. Were not in High School so grow UP.. People like this is why I stopped coming to Buddyslim.. I have a new website that I spend more time on. Ive came back here because I did love the support. When the bad people are filtered out. Lets show this woman that this is OUR website and she needs to get a life.. MOVE ON!

Ever have one of those days, where no matter what you do, you just can’t seem to allow yourself to sit down and relax for a few?

So far today I have done 40 Minutes Rhythm Boxing for Wii, a 3 mile walk with my mom, and Cleaned most of the kitchen Spotless.. I only have a few small things left to do to the kitchen. Tomorrow all I have to do is the Living room. Wondering if that will be enough to please me.

Tonight I find myself having a hard time sitting still. Even as I sit her blogging I want to get up and so something. I feel like Ive “over” charged myself or something. Last night I went to bed at 4 am.. got up at 1 pm.. and Ive been kinda crazy most the day. Ive had ups and downs.. No caffeine is involved either… Must be a natural high.

I had to turn all the lights off in the house aside from the room I’m in to keep me “seated”. I feel I should rest.. but deep down I wanna CLEAN.. Everyone from work thinks Im crazy because Im always cleaning. But its helping me lose weight. I have burned about as much calories as Ive ate today. I ate some food that was rather high in calories and fat this afternoon.. But I dont think its brought me down. Ive worked off the worse of what Ive ate. Cancelling those calories out.. Ive ate fruit.

Anyone else ever “over” charger.. Their “batteries”..

I’m going to force myself to go lay down and call it a night. I dont want another 4 am bed time.. I cant get in that habit.. I’m on vacation until Tuesday.. I want to be able to enjoy the day time instead of the night time..

Until next time.. The wifey on an adventure to a healthier me..

“It’s when ordinary people rise above the expectations and seize the opportunity that milestones truly are reached. “-Mike Huckabee

Milestones, are mini goals that keep us going when we don’t feel like moving on. My most recent milestone, is hitting 20 pounds lost since June. I am rather proud of my accomplishment. I have been struggling for the past few years to do what I am doing now. And it seems like for once, the pounds are melting off, two to three a week. Which is a nice slow pace, the way I prefer. I don’t want to be a tiny frail woman, I want to be a healthy curvy woman. I will never be “tiny” and frankly, I don’t want to be. I just don’t want to be as big as I am now. I am slowly approaching another milestone that I will be damn proud of when I hit it. This milestone is 250 pounds. I haven’t seen 250 pounds in a VERY long time. I will be happy when I see it, even happier If I even pass that. If I do that, I will definitely rise above my own expectations. I don’t see myself getting much lighter than 250, but I could be wrong.

Along with the 20 pound milestone, I have also hit a milestone of how long I have gone without drinking pop. I have approached 4 months without pop. I occasionally drink a sprite, or 7up but I don’t consider that “pop”. I have finally got past missing the taste of “pop”, anytime I even think about it, it gives me a instant headache and gut ache. I don’t see how I drank it for all those years, and now I know why I felt so horrible all the time. It was all the “poison” I put into my body. I often find myself asking people why they drink so much pop, when they know its not good for them. They look at me like I was hit by the crazy stick or something. I am just looking out for others health. I can be at my moms house and my Grandma will ask me If I’d like a pop. No, I don’t want a pop. I used to have to drink TWO cans of pop when eating pizza. Now when I “do” eat pizza, I replace it with 2 glasses of water, or sometimes a glass of Iced Tea, and a glass of Water. I don’t want to go back to drinking pop.

I am slowly trying to wing myself off of other food that is bad for me. I have slowed down on how much candy I eat. When someone at work goes to hand me a piece of candy, I think twice before eating it. I have some milestones I can’t wait to get to. I will get there slowly. A little bit at a time. Within time I will be a BETTER & HEALTHIER me! I can’t wait to that day comes. I want to be able to run, without losing my breath. I want to be able to do things with my family, without feeling like Im the fat one so why even try.

For the longest time I have longed to “fit” in. But right now, I really don’t care if I fit in. I am proud of what I have accomplished, proud of all that I have survived. Yes, life is hard all together, but its harder when you have people who “disown” you. For those who “disowned” me, you’re missing out on getting to know one great girl. I’m not selfish, unless it comes to my own health. I am not crazy, only when it comes to loving my husband. I am not a bitch, unless you make me one. If someone can’t accept me, I am not going to spend my entire life trying to fit in. I am going to live for once, instead of waiting to live. Life is too short to worry about what other think, say, or do. I will not let YOU drag me down. Instead YOU will inspire me to do better. One day YOU will see, I am not the person you say I should be. I’m not here on earth to fit in, but to stand out. If I dont stand out to you, then maybe I’m not meant to be in your life. I no longer long to “fit” in, but I long to “Stand” out..

Today, I ate some food that had lots of calories & fat in it, instead of sitting here and letting it turn to fat, I got up and played wii boxing.. It got my blood pumping. And now Im about ready to leave to go to my moms, to go for a walk with her. We will EVENTUALLY make it a 3 mile walk! I can’t wait to see how far we can go.. I love my life. It will only get better, as the pounds continue to melt away. I eat what Im not supposed to and I work my ass off to get rid of it. I am here to lose weight. I love eating what I Want, and I love even more working my ass of to lose the weight I have.. Looking at my picture from last week to this week, I see a little change in my belly already. I’m happy I have chosen to take weekly pictures of myself. Im proud of what Ive accomplished. No matter what anyone says! Happy Hump Day everyone! Until next time…

Today, at work (I work at Walmart), I parked next to the cart corral when I went into work. When I came out, I had this cart pushed up against my front bumper of my car. Are you freaken serious? I parked not even 2 feet away from the darn thing. Its ridiculous. I couldn’t believe how lazy, this person was. Its one of my biggest pet peeves. How hard is it to walk your cart the to cart corral, where it BELONGS. Yet, the people who don’t park them in the designated area, they are the ones who complain when their car gets hit by a runaway cart. If you put them in the designated area they are least likely to roll away. And they wonder why there are so many fat people in this world. Because they are too LAZY to do simple things like take care of their shopping carts. Due to their laziness eventually they have to ride around in the motorized carts, then they run you over. Its sad seeing overly obese people in those carts. When their condition was preventable. Something has got to give. I always make a point to push my shopping cart in the corral. And btw, there was a cart corral, in the row in front of me, and the row behind me. There were THREE cart corrals within “close” walking distance.

Ive had another good day. I have been using myfitnesspal.com to help me with my calorie intake and calories burned. It helps me out alittle more than on here sometimes. So, it has actually helped me lose a good 10 pounds of the 17 I’ve lost over the past 3 months. I took the plunge and got on the scale today, and Im holding at 295, which Im happy with that. Looking forward to what I can do yet.

Had another good day, as far as food wise. I had over 200 calories left at the end of the day. Hoping for another good day tomorrow. Im feeling good, aside from my horrible back pain right now. Ugh! I hate it! I hope something gives soon. Trying to give it a little more rest before I do too much. I managed to get MOST of the dishes done tonight, which helped.

Hope everyone had a great Tuesday. Tomorrow Ill probably be “over” a little bit. Going to the bar with some girls from work, going to have a few drinks. Im sure they wont help.. Lol! Wish me luck!

After getting out of work, (I work at Walmart) I walked thru the store to pick up a few things for dinner. During my walk thru the store, I found myself hungry. For once, instead of picking up “junk” food. I found myself picking up fruit, Sugar Free Jello, Sugar Free Candy (for when I have a sweet tooth), Light Yogurt, and Low Fat string Cheese.. I grabbed 2 more gallons of water. I love water, but if I dont have it in the refrigerator, I find myself trying to resort to something else to drink. Although, it isnt pop, because I can’t stand drinking it anymore. I havent gotten up to do any extra exercise today. Trying to give my back a rest, since it hurts soo bad tonight. Im thinking about taking a nice bath, and relaxing..